It's NOT who you are, it's who you THINK you're not
Motherhood, NaBloPoMo

Worry. #NaBloPoMO

NaBloPoMo Blog Prompt 7 If you could permanently get rid  of one worry, what would it be?

NaBloPoMo_1114_465x287_NOV_0

OH WOW! Just one worry?  Obviously, whoever picked this prompt doesn’t know I’m a bucket of worries, I’m really working on that, and I’m MUCH better, now. In the past  I’ve written about how my worry/concern can take me down a never ending rabbit hole, it’s true.  There was this post where I talk about how motherhood has shaped my worry.  Most recently, I wrote about this worry, I think many of us share that worry.

 

What makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful- Brene Brown

However, I was asked to choose just ONE, I’m searching real hard.  I don’t want to say I want to lose all worry for my children, because they’re my babies, and worry is also somewhat instinctual, right?  That mama bear instinct kicks in, because there is a spot of worry inside, no?  It's NOT who you are, it's who you THINK you're not

I guess, I could stop worrying about what I think they are thinking, or not thinking.  You know mama guilt… it’s a form of worry.  I question if I’m doing enough, if I’m doing too much, if I’m doing it right, if I’m giving enough of me.

You're not Nutella, you cannot  make everyone happy.

Mama guilt and I have been battling it out since 2002, and I’m not sure if I will ever win. However, I do know this, I’m a damn good mama, I love my babies, insanely. They’re doing alright, and I know I need to remind myself of this more.

 

© 2014, Dean @Mrs. AOK, A Work In Progress. All rights reserved.

21 thoughts on “Worry. #NaBloPoMO”

  1. I’m with you. I think part of being a mom is worrying. You bring these little people into the world and there are so many things out of your control once you do and you want the best lives for them that you can provide. I definitely worry sometimes….not so much about now, but more about the future. I think the most we can do is love them fiercely and hopefully guide them along a path to make them strong, loving, compassionate human beings.

    1. I gather it’s somewhere in our genetic makeup to worry once becoming a mother. Perhaps, it’s our leftover animal instinct?
      I’ve worried about the future as well. It’s hard, you want to protect your babies from everything, yet, you want to let them live.
      Parenting isn’t easy, and it’s most definitely not for the faint at heart. We have long hours, long days, but short years.
      XOXO

  2. I was a single mom when my daughter was still very young. Very shortly after my ex left, I found out that I have a genetic condition that causes sudden cardiac arrest. The same condition had already claimed my father and brother while they were still relatively young. The thought of her waking up to find me dead made me absolutely nauseous with fear. I taught her how to call for help, use my bank card to draw all funds out of the bank before the bank freezes my account and how to stop the car if it should happen while I was driving. There were a million other precautions. No child should have to live like that, but the threat was very real. I never thought about not being there to see her grow up. My concern was that she was most likely the person who would find me.

    We lived. She is grown, still the possibility that she will be the person to find me haunts me.

    1. Oh, Lisa, I’m terribly sorry to hear you lost your father and brother. I cannot even begin to imagine the worry in your heart. It had to be so hard for you to prepare your daughter for such a scary situation.
      Your worry, is one of my worries, but YOUR worry has to be highly elevated, I’m sure. I’m happy you have been able to see your daughter grow, there will be more time with her.
      Sending you love!XO

    2. Awww wow! I am sorry to hear that, but you are a awesome mom in that you were able to prepare her for the “if”. I cant imagine how hard that must have been to explain and make sure she knew.

  3. This is really a hard question because I want to say money issues but of course if I didn’t have to worry about my daughter that would really take a load of stress off! I worry about her being a teenager the most lately. She is so headstrong now that I worry constantly that we are always going to be at odds. I know that it won’t be easy, Lord knows what I put my own parents through. I guess I just always worry that we will have a good relationship as she gets older. Oh and also that she’s not going to be angry with us for being an only child. Ughhhh

    1. This was a tough question. Money, health, kids, and future are always floating in the never-ending worry juggle, right? I don’t worry too much about the teen years, well, until someone mentions when the kids are driving or graduating 🙁
      I have a tween right now, and I have to be honest I was afraid we’d drift away, but so far so good. I’m thankful for the conversations we have, you’re going to love it! Plus, if your daughter keeps seeing you read, she’ll be a reader, can we say book club!?!?
      I don’t think she’ll be angry only child, you have family near, right? Isn’t she close to her cousins? Who can complain about being the center of their parents world?
      XOXO

  4. Oh the mama-guilt worries. I have them. And I have all the other worries, too.

    Love that you took on this writing prompt, because I had the same thought as you did when I saw it – “I have to pick just one!?”

    Your Nutella picture made me giggle.

    1. Mama-guilt is the worst!! This was a tough prompt, I really had to rifle through my bag of worries, and weigh them out pro and con.
      My husband always says I have to lay off the mama guilt, which is obviously is an indicator, it must be pretty noticeable 🙂
      I’m so over mama-guilt!
      XOXO

  5. I think it is part of motherhood, or parenting in general although I don’t really know that.

    This writing prompt is hard! Like Tracie, I wouldn’t be able to pick just one.

    I told Scarlet what Nutella was just today. I think she’s intrigued!

    1. Yes, I think it is. I believe it’s one of our animal instincts we’ve somehow evolved in a non-progressive way… maybe {insert confused looking emoticon}

      It was tough to pick one! My husband has no idea why I suffer from Mama-guilt, he always tells me, “stop, you’re a good mom” and although I know this, I can’t stop :-/

      Nutella is heavenly, did you tell her that? My husband doesn’t like it–weirdo. He will eat Nutella, if it is in cookies or cake, not off of a spoon like a regular human being.
      XOXO

  6. I used to be a worry wart before kids and afterward it just got worse. I try to take deep breaths but it is hard to stay calm when the thoughts take over. Worry is not fun but I need to learn to let some of it go.

    1. Motherhood seems to bring out the worry in all of us. Perhaps, we should take comfort in the fact that we are not alone in our worry as mothers. Easier said than done, I know. I’m not sure as mothers, we will ever let go, but I think we can loosen up, right?
      All the best~
      XOXO

  7. I think we all definitely sahre this worry and I also think it may be the one and only healthy one (in moderation). The fact that we are concerned about our children, their well-being and how they see us simply proves how much we love and care for them. You are an Aaaah-May-Zing Momma and I know your children know that because hey I can tell and I’m over 100 miles away 😀 xoxoxo

    1. Thank you!!!! That was sweet 🙂
      All things in moderation.?. I need to start moderating 🙂
      I wonder if my parents worried about my siblings & I, as much as I do with my babies.
      XO

  8. One worry? My gosh…
    Im with you the mom guilt is rough and it never goes away!
    But if somehow i got a bonus one my next worry would be my hubby, he carries so much and is so much to so many in his family that i find myself waking up worrying about him. He knows when i am doing it to, cause he’ll say “will you stop worrying and get some sleep” in the middle of the night!
    Thanks for linking up! #SHINEbloghop

    1. One worry was tough for me. I worry about my husband too, he does so much for us, and he doesn’t LOVE his job, but again, he does it for us.
      XOXO

  9. The fact that you have mama guilt/worry shows what an awesome mama you are! You love your babies with every piece of you and then some, but for me at least, there are days I feel like a complete failure. I guess all you can really do is love with your entire being and tell them you love. Hugs wonderful mama! XOXO

  10. I think mom guilt and mom worry just comes with the territory. If we didn’t feel it, we wouldn’t be good moms, right? I worry about my kids every day and unfortunately that’s never going to change. Keep on worrying that means you’re doing your job and doing it well.
    And if I could be a jar of nutella, it might go far in helping to easy my worries, and my kids worries. However, the one child with the nut allergy, he’s out of luck. Poor guy.

    1. I agree, worry and motherhood kind of go hand in hand. I will never stop worrying about these babies, it’s the very reason I started homeschool. Homeschool, although it’s only been one week, has created a new worry, am I good enough to do this…
      However, this week went fantastic, I had a lesson, stuck to it, and the kids LEARNED 🙂
      Sorry, about the nut allergy… poor little guy.
      XOXO

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